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Northern Express
Wednesday, 15 April 2009

P 4 W 0 D 1 L 3 = 1 point  Game week 2


0-1,  0-0, 1-2, 4-0  



Well then lads, yet again a great effort from all the lads that showed up last night. At the risk of sounding like a broken record, it wasn’t our night although this time, a lot of it was down to us, rather than us just being unlucky like a few weeks back. Having said that, looking at the teams in the group, this could easily have been a Division 2 group, or maybe even a Division 1 group, such were the strength of all the teams in it.

The lads were all in high spirits as per normal which was great to see. Apparently there had been a small matter of a golf game the previous weekend and our resident golf pro Grifter, had taken a bit of a thumping from Mad Vlad and Bronski MkII. This was only mentioned a thousand or so times prior to the first game and Bronski Mk II even wore a new T shirt to commemorate the win.

Beavis has obviously been taking the advice on cross dressing at the football and decided to leave his wife’s new outfit at home rather than wearing it and showing it off to all the lads. Good call Lionel.

The old Bronski watch has obviously been cast aside by all as we were all there well on time prior to KO which was great to see.

Our first game kicked off against Vaxim Divar. Jeffo was constantly telling everyone how Divar would play the game by keeping possession then knocking it long to one guy in particular who would be running the wing. He would then cut inside and score. They do this every game.

We started well and Divar seemed to be giving us plenty of possession without actually seriously threatening their goal.

Divar then knocked the ball long to one guy in particular who was running down the right wing. He then cut inside and slotted the ball past Hancock who was left exposed at the back. They had done it yet again. The Elite continued to push forward when Divar tried the same trick again. This time, Hancock was aware of the threat and was quick out of his box to thwart the attack. Unfortunately for Colin, handling the ball between the box and the half way line isn’t legal. Dave the ref gave a direct free kick to Divar and sent off Hancock for the remainder of the game. This seemed harsh due to the fact that Hancock had done the same two weeks ago twice and only received one free kick against. Anyway, No.9 came off and made way for Grifter who went straight into goals. He made a good save from the free kick and the Elite pushed forward even at a man down to try and get a goal back. We were always being pushed back and in the dying seconds Grifter did brilliantly pushing a vicious shot onto the post to keep the score down. Final whistle blew and first game ended without any points.

The guys came off a little down, but they had competed well especially when we went a player down. No disgrace losing to Divar at anytime with 5 players let alone 4.

We then had the one match break and were trying to gather our thoughts going into the second game.

The second game was against the league 3 leaders, and probably the dirtiest team I have had the misfortune to watch on a Tuesday night, ALA Goblins. I actually half expected Graeme Souness and Terry Hurlock to show up as subs for this team, they are that bad.

We started well against the Goblins and were pushing them about, showing who was actually boss. A couple of really crude challenges by one of their players had Shando’s back up. I wasn’t sure if he was more worried about the kicks he was taking or about dirtying his new boots. The ref in the second game seemed a lot more lenient than Dave in the first game as the challenges continually went unpunished. This seemed to let the Goblins think that they could get away with it and they continued throughout the game. Beavis and Lee also were at the end of some heavy challenges, again nothing being done about it. Credit to all the lads who managed to keep their cool during this game as it was difficult for us on the touchline not to run on and nut anyone playing in black strips. The game was pretty much played in the middle of the pitch as both teams struggled to test either keeper.

Game ended at 0-0 and the first point was on the board for the night.

Next game was against the Locker Room who were sitting bottom of the group after not turning up last week.

I always enjoy being involved with the Locker Room due to the Scandinavian lad, Thumper, at the back. He is so easily wound up and I was looking forward to a few more of his attempts to break his own wrist by pounding the pitch when either they miss chances or f*ck things up. He seemed particularly happy this week, as he seemed to have new shiny plastic red boots.

We were playing well against the Locker room when they scored completely against the run of play. Thumper was jumping up and down like a rabid rabbit in heat. Prick. Instead of the heads going down though, the Elite continued to push forward and chance after chance was spurned.

No.9 then came off the bench to collect the ball on the left wing. He cut inside and unleashed a cracking shot that the keeper could only have dreamt to save. It almost burst the net and took the Elite level. Again Thumper attempted to punch a hole in the pitch to everyone’s delight concerned with the Elite. We kept pushing forward at every opportunity as a couple of other great chances went begging including a cracking shot from No.9 that came back off the bar.

Then came Thumper’s crowning glory moment.

He picked the ball up inside his own box, he then seemed to Wayne Sleep esque dance his way past the entire Elite team and slotted the ball past Hancock at the back. The standard pitch thumping was greeted with disgust on the Elite touchline especially as the final whistle blew seconds after the restart.

Final Score 1-2 to Locker Room.

Into the last game against Stevie Summers’ Seven Wonders.

We really needed to get something form this game as we were staring Division 4 in the face. The guys were well up for it and were knocking the ball about well. SW then took the lead, simple ball through the heart of the Elite midfield had a two against one at the back and the ball was behind Hancock for the 4th time on the night. Again, the heads didn’t go down and we were pushing for an equalizer.

No.9 was sent on to try and add a bit of fight from the midfield area. Unfortunately right at the exact moment, Satch, who had run himself into the ground all night, signaled he needed subbed. He went off at the far side of the pitch as Shando was sent on to go upfront and try and rattle up the SW. Total confusion then ensued as SW complained to the ref we had 6 players on the pitch, so Shando walked off. He was sent back on by Fairmer who was trying to give instructions to No.9 to tell him where he was playing. Everyone seemed to stop on the spot as the ref shouted play on. The only team that appeared to hear that was SW, and they promptly strolled forward to slot in the second goal of the game.

The heads went down a little understandably and we then lost another two goals to compound our misery.

Final score 0-4 and the Elite trudged off the pitch for the last time on the night.

Again, a very disappointing outcome to the evening.

The crack was there, but the team spirit that was there a few weeks ago didn’t seem to surface a lot last night. No idea why, it just didn’t seem to be as evident as it has been in the past few weeks. We win as a team and we lose as a team.

Quodos to Jeffo, Hancock, Beavis, Grifter, Satchmo, Lee, Shando and Chopstix.

Good support again from the touchlines from Mad Vlad, Dillon, Jake and Andrew. It probably isn’t enough to keep us in the 3rd Division but no point crying about it, we need to pick ourselves back up and get back to where we belong.

P.S. This was Wullie after being told that we might fall another division. His response was “C’mon the Elite, onward and upward!” 

God knows best lads….unless it comes to keeping the two Jimmies in a job of course……

--"The Fairmer"

Posted by dubainefc at 3:03 PM

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